“Manipulative Love Letters”, excerpt #5. The Other Woman.

Rebekah             I’m sorry I should have been more specific this afternoon when we sorta talked. I can’t or couldn’t (depending on when you read this) see you tonight because I was afraid to! As I said for the past five nights in a row you have treated me like poison for 5 different reasons. I’ve got to take a break from that. I’ve tried to tell you over and over again that I’m right on the “edge”. I need comfort and love and a hell of a lot more understanding than I deserve. You’ve shown me that you can’t do (more…)

I had an Epiphany about the Narcissist.

I’ve been working on creating an audiobook about the Jewish daily prayers. I was doing a segment explaining what a brit is (a covenant) and I had an epiphany about the narcissist. Basically, I was explaining how I loved the narcissist unconditionally. I compared my love for David to the way God feels about us, which is to say that no matter what I do, God will never abandon me. He is right by my side, even when I behave like a rotten stinker. In a thunderclap moment, I realized that something was wrong with what I was saying. I stopped to (more…)

Red Flags that Your Lover is Abusive.

I am re-posting this image because it is a snapshot of my ex-marriage to my ex-abuser. Conversations went like this: ignore me yawn avoid eye contact interrupt mention some mistake I made 3 years ago deny talk thru me or shout over me be dismissive hijack the conversation Please share this:Click to share on Twitter (Opens in new window)Click to share on Facebook (Opens in new window)Click to share on Pinterest (Opens in new window)Click to share on Tumblr (Opens in new window)Click to share on Pocket (Opens in new window)Click to share on Google+ (Opens in new window)Click to share (more…)

Shout-Out to: The Narcissist’s Wife.

The Narcissist’s Wife writes: You can’t be anything but sick, when you fill your heart and home with something toxic. http://thenarcissistswife.com/2015/08/18/wait-am-i-the-narcissist FOLK ART DAY OF THE DEAD HAPPY SKULLS NEEDLEPOINT CANVAS by ARTIST PRISTINE CARTERA TURKUS. Available for purchase at www.kathysneedleworks.com Please share this:Click to share on Twitter (Opens in new window)Click to share on Facebook (Opens in new window)Click to share on Pinterest (Opens in new window)Click to share on Tumblr (Opens in new window)Click to share on Pocket (Opens in new window)Click to share on Google+ (Opens in new window)Click to share on Reddit (Opens in new window)Click to (more…)

Lies Cheaters Tell.

I was at my supposedly monogamous and committed-to-me boyfriend’s house. He was fixing me lunch and we were having fun watching some movie. It was a very low key afternoon, the kind of date you have when you are poor and can’t afford to go anywhere. Someone knocked on his front door. It turned out to be some other woman that he had been fucking in secret, but had told me that he was sorry and it was all over. Damn! She came right to his front door while I was there with him. I put myself in her shoes and (more…)

Today’s Manipulative Love Letter from Ex-Boyfriend.

Unknown date, Nov 1987: My Beautiful Rebekah,     I love you more than anything I’ve ever known, I’ve said this bunch of times before because it’s true. Because I love you so much I’ll truly respect your decision and never bother you in any way. If we pass please don’t be rude or bitter, just smile and say hello or hi or something. I won’t try and talk or leave anymore notes I know how badly I fucked things up. I’ve been paying for some of those things for a long long time. This is pretty hard for me, I’ve finally driven (more…)

Remembering the Narcissist and the Mania.

favim.com Today I unpacked a box from Israel and found one of my homemade, inspirational posters that was dated “20 June 2013”. I can’t upload a photograph of the poster because it has David’s real name on it, inside a pink and purple heart, of course; but the poster says this: What would I be able to accomplish if David were arriving today? You see, after the narcissist David left me (discarded me), I believed he was coming back soon. He kept telling me that he could not and would not be coming back ever; but I refused to listen. I (more…)