Tag: Guilt

A Cat Story. 31 March 2018.

I’ve been doing this thing on Facebook where I share “5 Positives” each night before bed; but tonight’s post would be: I’m positive that today sucked. I started a beautiful new life by moving out of my brother’s house, getting off of my brother’s couch, and renting my own room from a person who is Read More

Today was the best day ever.

I deserve to have an awesome day at least once a week! And that day is always Tuesday, my day off from work. (It maybe should be Shabbat, but that is another story. Sorry, had to express my guilt at feeling JOY.) On Tuesdays, I go see Doctor Li and get Chinese acupuncture needles stuck Read More

Recovery is Being Generous to Yourself.

Yesterday, I wrote that “There is no hypocrisy in recovery.” link As survivors of narcissistic abuse, we have all made pledges that quote “I won’t be fooled again” and “I will never ignore red flags again”, “I learned my lesson”, etcetera. But maybe you will fall off the self-esteem wagon. Maybe you will get lonely Read More

Today’s Manipulative Love Letter from Ex-Boyfriend.

Unknown date, Nov 1987: My Beautiful Rebekah,     I love you more than anything I’ve ever known, I’ve said this bunch of times before because it’s true. Because I love you so much I’ll truly respect your decision and never bother you in any way. If we pass please don’t be rude or bitter, just smile Read More

Manipulative Love Letters.

These happen to be from an alcoholic drug addict, but narcissists and abusers use the same tactics. For example, he projects that I will think he is out with another woman because he was actually out with another woman! However, I had no clue and I wasn’t worried because I trusted him. Next, I got Read More

Suicide & Entitlement.

I realize that I have been acting bratty. I want stuff, but I haven’t worked for it. I want life to be easier, but that is childish wishing. I have been acting entitled… and I know it. Here’s my reasoning: I am supposed to be dead. It’s not fair that I have to stay here Read More

Food: A Child Abuse Story.

I’ve been planning for three months to write this post, but remembering the incidents is a trigger for me. It usually causes me to get overly anxious and then I take a Xanax; but I haven’t eaten any Xanax in about 40 days, so I don’t want to need one now. I could simply avoid Read More

Child Abuse Survivor Challenge: Day 3.

What is a weakness or struggle that you want to work on that you developed from child abuse, and how has it already improved compared to what it was? This post discusses sex. Please do not read it if you are under age 18. (Disclaimer: Nothing I wrote here reflects Torah values. Maybe I’ll explain Read More

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