Trying to make an appointment with a mental health professional.

This USA ObamaCare Affordable Care Act stuff is complicated. Did you know that if I did not have medical insurance thru my employer, then I would get fined 700 dollars? I would get fined, not my employer! Many, many employers were given amnesty by the government. They do not have to affect profits by giving medical coverage to their workers, but the workers still get fined if we don’t have coverage.

-And so evil increases in the world.

Starting January 1st, 2016, I did get coverage thru my employer (Evil Corporation). I pay $90 a month for high-deductible insurance. After I spend $2750 on my medical and mental heath needs, only then would the plan begin to reimburse me 80/20 for my expenses. In real numbers, if I were to dedicate 25% of my paycheck each week to mental healthcare, then the insurance would activate 6 months from now. However, if something catastrophic were to happen (for example, a hospital stay), then my bills might be 80% covered. I had much better coverage when I was poor and underemployed. Go figure. No wonder people who have sick kids, kids with asthma or diabetes, cannot afford to take jobs. It doesn’t make sense to me.

Today I had the day off, so I tried to schedule an appointment with a mental health professional. I need a proper psychological evaluation to determine the best psych meds for me, and I  need talk therapy – at a minimum. I hope to establish a lengthy and fruitful relationship with a counsellor so that I can become a happier person and learn coping skills, etc.

First I phoned the Employee Assistance Program (EAP) because they offer 6 free appointments with a mental health counsellor. The service gave me 2 phone numbers. The first number was defunct but also the center turned out to be located inside a Christian church. I am very not Christian. The second number turned out to be someone’s personal cellphone. She wanted to know how I got it and when I mentioned insurance, she said her office would probably be too far away. How unhelpful.

Next I called back to EAP and was told they had made a mistake. My employer only offers counselling by phone. Apparently, I can call in 24 hours a day as much as I want, but if I need more than just a friendly ear, they would refer me to my doctor. I don’t know how I feel about this. On the one hand, it’s free, but if I spoke truthfully, they would be required by law to have me institutionalized “for my own safety”. It’s an impossible situation. If I admit that I need counselling because I am a suicide risk, then I no longer qualify for the program; but if I can’t speak freely about my feelings, then I can’t use the program. How unhelpful.

Next, I went directly to my Blue Cross Blue Shield coverage. I called the recommended Clinical Psychologist and she said, and I quote:

“Oh, I took the call because I thought you were someone who I needed to talk to – but you aren’t. I’m doing something else right now, so I’ll have to call you back.”

What? Her tone of voice was really rude and unfeeling, therefore, she eliminated herself. Clearly, she could not become my future therapist. She did call back and I asked her about prescriptions. She told me that only a Psychiatrist can write prescriptions. Good ’cause that eliminated her.

Next, I gave up for today and tried to schedule a gynecologist appointment instead. The insurance website offered me 4 doctors to choose from. Only one had an actual profile and he was a man. Oh boy, I do not want to be  examined by a male gynecologist; but he had good credentials. I called the office to schedule my first appointment and was informed that either I could have an exam or I could have time to talk with the doctor, but the doctor won’t have time to discuss my health concerns with me unless I schedule a consultation; but at a consultation, he will want to see my exam results. What? I had to call back twice for clarification because I didn’t understand. I don’t understand. How traumatic for me, a survivor of sexual abuse, to have a strange man insert his entire forearm into my vagina, but I’m not allowed to talk to him. What?

I made an appointment for next week, but I’ll probably cancel it. I feel overwhelmed and misunderstood. And sad. I feel sad that even with insurance, I can’t get decent healthcare. What is happening to our world? Seriously, I need God to fix this for me. I need a miracle to guide me to the right people who can help me to recover. Pray for me, please.