This is how I felt after divorcing a narcissist and seeing him steal most of my belongings. When dealing with a narcissist, sometimes you just gotta cut your losses and get out.
I agree as well. I walked away from PSS and alimony and ED in an attempt to just get away! Fighting him for money would have been sealing my fate since he would have gone on the warpath. However, he hasn’t accept my token child support number which is lower than what he was paying – all this to get rid of and reduce conflict. I can’t afford any more lawyer bills so this was also preferable to having to try to represent myself. I am trying to cut my losses but he wants to remain connected and the only way he can do it is through the courts.
I understand you want out, away, and OUT – but you have children. Make him pay them. They deserve good shoes and a winter coat. They might want to go to music camp or university. At the end of the court battle, the court will force him to pay some of the attorney’s fees.
The thing is, it is classic narcissistic abuse what he is doing to you. You give concessions and he never gives. When it was just me, this wasn’t fair – but when your children are going to robbed of money they will need, don’t let him rob them. I got an aggressive attorney, gave him a small retainer, and let him talk directly to my ex, taking me out of the conflict.
I am so sorry you are going thru this, a divorce with a narcissist, but think of him as attacking your children. He is stealing their future dreams by withholding financial support. May you be strengthened to handle this crisis.
If I take his money he will come at us harder because that’s what hectares about the most… However I understand what you are saying. No matter how many concessions I make, he might not stop.
For sure, there is no easy answers. ((cyberhugs))
I really appreciate the re-blog :D
Serenity prayer: God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.
I see the similarity, but I could have changed the outcome. I believed that it was wiser and healthier to just let go, to choose not to fight. Thanks for the reminder.
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