Today’s verbal abuse was “I’m going out now, and you’ll be here, eating and sleeping.”
Just because she doesn’t know what I’m doing, does not mean I’m doing nothing.
It would be even worse if she knew I was writing. Besides being a waste of time and without intrinsic value, writing means revealing secrets about my family, the worst kind of disloyalty.
I say “Let the civil disobedience reign!”… and yet, it is rather passive-aggressive of me to blog in secret about our confrontational home. I don’t know any other way to handle the abuse and I feel safer when I blog about it. I am being selfish and disloyal, and I do fear the day when I get exposed – because, after that day, I will have no more family. For sure, they will abandon me outright. I don’t know the answer. I’m just a kid who wants her mommy to love her… with her words.