It seems to me that the difference between my blog about surviving narcissistic abuse and similar blogs is my excellent memory. My mother had a true photographic memory until she was a teenager and it is in my genes to have an exceptional memory. When I used to attend Jenny Craig classes to learn healthy eating habits, the instructor taught us that most people have to read something 3 times in order to retain 70% of the information. I only have to read something once to retain 90% of the information, and I was born this way. It’s not a gift that I somehow “earned”. I just have a unique ability to remember data.
I have scads of incidents of narcissistic abuse stored in my memory cells and all I have to do is write them down. These stories make my blog stand out because they actually happened. My stories show the real-life progression of the arguments that happen when a sane person tries to negotiate with a narcissist. The dialogues are real; the outcomes are real; the crazy is real.
My problem is that I remember the incidents of abuse so well that I actually re-feel the distress when I draw them out from wherever a person stores memories. Writing about the abuse I suffered entails both reliving the abuse and re-experiencing the uncomfortable emotions (like injustice, frustration, anger, shame, and hurt). Sometimes it makes me freak out.