Still Having Dreams About Homelessness.

I am still dreaming about homelessness, possessions, and theft. This time I was in a large department store like Macy’s. It was bright and had large windows looking out onto the street where pedestrians were strolling by, dressed 1950’s style – men in brown suits with hats and women in dresses with fitted bodices and flared skirts. All the women wore this type of hairstyle: Inside the department store, I was at the jewelry counter looking at shiny, rhinestone, costume jewelry. I wasn’t planning to purchase anything. I was just admiring the designs and the sparkle. The jewelry department was very (more…)

I Really Miss David.

I really miss David. He is the one friend, no, the best friend, no the dearest friend who would make me feel so confident 48 hours before I face Driftwood in court. 40 second recap: My ex-husband, Driftwood (narcissist), is required by law to buy me out of our former marital home. I offered a very reasonable settlement because I erroneously hoped it would help the case to be settled quickly. Driftwood’s counteroffer was… ZERO. There is no negotiating with a narcissist. A 61-day trial becomes 300+ days. Now, in theory, we are going before the judge and s/he will assign a dollar (more…)

Reblog: Poem: Booked

More awesome poetry from Feed-the-feesh. Please share this:Click to share on Twitter (Opens in new window)Click to share on Facebook (Opens in new window)Click to share on Pinterest (Opens in new window)Click to share on Tumblr (Opens in new window)Click to share on Pocket (Opens in new window)Click to share on Google+ (Opens in new window)Click to share on Reddit (Opens in new window)Click to email this to a friend (Opens in new window)Click to print (Opens in new window)Like this:Like Loading... (more…)

Tony Stark Should Make Batman His Dog-Walker.

This is a letter to David – an actual letter to David – and not a blog post.  With the whole “No Contact with a Narcissist Rule”, I have to maintain boundaries and try not to poke the sleeping dragons. Dear David, I just watched “Iron Man 3”. Now he’s a superhero to admire. “The Mechanic”. You’re too young to remember MacGyver, but he was the hottest thing in America from 1985 until 1992. That’s almost a decade! Men wanted to be him; women wanted to ***** him; and 75% of the country had the MacGyver haircut. starkravingmadmommy.com Sexy and smart (more…)

I survived the weekend.

Last post, I was having a little freakout. My ex-husband phoned me and rattled my chains. I was feeling despair (see post about despair: Ayn Yeush BaOlam) that I would never be able to get free of him, no matter how far away I ran. I confessed that I wanted to die (or more specifically, I wanted to kill myself). The first 3 days were rough, but I started to recover just hours before Shabbat. I reminded myself that I did get a pre-warning. (I guess the correct term is advance warning.) I wrote about the dream message that I would (more…)

Whirlpool. Suing a Narcissist.

Driftwood phoned me two nights ago (because his attorney told him to) and we talked for 67 minutes. The result of contact with the narcissist was to spit me into depression. I decided to cope with my feelings of helplessness and doom by drinking beer and eating brownies until I fell asleep. I also took a few drugs: 10mg of Valium, a muscle relaxer, and a non-prescription sleep aid. Sadly, I woke up after only one hour and felt completely rested. That was not my plan. I meant to numb my pain via completely unhealthy means. Obviously, it is unwise to (more…)

Reblog: Poem: “Let it go…” – by Penelope Dreamweaver

Poem by Penelope Dreamweaver. Please share this:Click to share on Twitter (Opens in new window)Click to share on Facebook (Opens in new window)Click to share on Pinterest (Opens in new window)Click to share on Tumblr (Opens in new window)Click to share on Pocket (Opens in new window)Click to share on Google+ (Opens in new window)Click to share on Reddit (Opens in new window)Click to email this to a friend (Opens in new window)Click to print (Opens in new window)Like this:Like Loading... (more…)