I try to let both Rivka and Evil Twin Rivka express themselves on my blog. Some days I love my narcissist unconditionally, and some days I want to run him over with a big truck, back and forth, leaving tire tracks on his chest where his heart should be. Lovely. Such is the true nature of grief.
As the months of No Contact roll on, I turn more to myself for answers and less to David. Besides, narcissists never give you answers.
…So I have to admit that I am a FIXER.
I like to repair broken china.
I like to bring soup to the sick.
I like to make peace between fussy friends.
And I like to heal broken men.
Narcissists are extremely broken men (or women).
I cry out, “Why can’t I have a healthy partner?”
But, really, what would I do with a healthy partner?
If there’s nothing to fix, I’m not that interested.
Well, nothing is for certain except CHANGE.
The seed is planted.