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One of the ways that a narcissistic mate manipulates the significant other is with the “Tug-o-War of Love”. The narcissist makes it quite clear that if you misbehave, they will excise you. This can be done by using the silent treatment, by going out with friends and not taking you along, by disappearing for a week and not returning your calls or texts, and by many other tortures up to and including dumping you. When you are dating a narcissist, you learn to behave. David used to control me with fake anger. One time in particular, David got angry with me,