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Disclaimer: please do not read this post if you are under age 18 or if you might be triggered by a description of self-mutilation. I was feeling very calm when I decided to commit suicide. My rational mind was in control, mentally organizing my to-do list. I would have to clean the apartment, to dispose of any items which might embarrass my family. The first order of business was to do a thorough walk-thru of the apartment, to search all my belongings, and to separate items that needed to go into the trash. For example, my vibrators and dildos (Every woman