I have been reading other people’s blogs about abuse, PTSD, and dating; and I feel guilty. Other people have stories that are so much worse than mine. Sure, David broke my heart. He targeted me and then crushed me spiritually and emotionally in a Narcissistic Devalue & Discard – but he didn’t take my children from me, or take our house and leave me homeless, or empty my bank account and leave me penniless. But there’s a problem with my way of thinking. I am homeless (couch-surfing), jobless, and penniless, and I don’t have any children for him to take. This attitude of minimizing my suffering is part of what made me such a great target for David, the Narcissist, in the first place. If he needed the shirt off my back, I would have given it to him. When he needed a new computer because he ‘is a writer’, I sent him my rent money. I worked 55 hours a week for 6 weeks to get back on my feet, and he refused to repay me. He said the loan was a gift. I used to agree to be burdened because I knew I was strong enough to take it. So he burdened me until I cracked my vessel. This survivor’s attitude of “Bring it on ’cause I can take it.” is false bravado. It creates an opening for the abuser to enter and stab me in the kidneys. Even if other people’s situations are worse than mine, I still deserve: therapy, financial assistance, medical help, housing, safety, and to get well. I feel so sad for the other survivors, but we are not competing for resources. God is infinite and He can provide assistance and resources for all of us without taking away from anyone else. If you need help recovering from trauma or abuse, go get it. Learn to see yourself as worthwhile. You know, Rivka, if you are going to give advice, you had better follow it yourself first. Love yourself enough to get therapy and to heal.